The power of the Holy Spirit

I learned an important lesson tonight.  Never be surprised when God answers a prayer.  I'm reading a book right now Forgotten God and going through Isaiah for BSF.  Well I decided this week that I was going to pray for the power of the Holy Spirit to work in my heart and my life.  That I would experience the Holy Spirit in a new, profound way.  Well surprise surprise God is faithful to answer prayer.  Tonight my mom, step dad, and mother in law and I went to missions fest.  Gracia Burnham was the key note speaker for the night.  For those of you who do not remember them they were new tribes missionaries (missionary pilots just like Chad and I are going to be) and were living in the Philippines.  They were captured and held for over a year by the Abu Sayyaf terrorist group.  Gracia's husband Martin was killed during the 17th and final gun fight during their captivity.  She now speaks and has written two books.  Tonight God used her to speak to me in a powerful way.  But before I get to that, lets back up a few days. 
On Wednesday Chad and I met with the MAF (missionary aviation fellowship) recruiter about starting our journey as missionaries.  Chad has been working towards getting all of his requirements for three years now and is ALMOST done!  Praise God.  So we got the rest of the details and set a timeline to work towards...JULY!  Lord willing and only Lord willing we will start our candidacy in July.  Well, I have known that God has been paving the way for us for these three years and have seen him work in mighty ways as he has provided for us and opened door after door.  During our meeting it became very clear that Chad needed more general aviation experience so that he would be comfortable passing his TEC eval in June for MAF.  Well Thursday the head of MATA, Chad's school, told him of a potential opportunity for a new job in general aviation.  He will get more info on that on Tuesday.  But how amazing of the Lord to bring that opportunity just one day after our meeting with Perry. 
Now the idea of us being missionaries has always settled very well with me and I knew I was called to missions since 2000.  However, the reality of the call was not all that, I don't know powerful to me until tonight.  While Gracia was speaking I with out a doubt was filled with the Holy Spirit.  I felt an ache deep inside my soul to answer the Lord's call to missions.  I began to cry for reasons I still don't understand other than I was faced with my own selfishness and the power of the Lord.  I was speechless, couldn't sing the last song, but my spirit was singing and crying out to Him.  Thank goodness the Lord knows our thoughts and hearts because I had no words.  Gracia spoke of her own sin during that year in the jungle.  The sin of hating her captures, the sin of coveting FOOD (she knew she needed to trust the Lord for her needs and not be jealous of what others had).  I listened to her speak of those "sins" as she described them and I was humbled.  I had a rush of "oh my word Lord, I am a prideful, stubborn, covetous woman."  I pray that the Lord will start changing my heart now and preparing me for our journey.  I am so comfortable with this world, with the things I have..my coffee creamer, my bed, comfy clothes, tv, internet, to name a few.  We worry about jobs, money, selling a house...but where is my trust!  Is God the Lord of my life, my entire life??  Absolutely so I better start honoring him and revering him.  He has called me, weak, sinful, little me to go and serve him.  Isaiah 6:8 "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "whom shall I send? and who will go for us? And I said, Here am I, Send Me!"  I heard that tonight, the Lord asking me, will you really go?  Will you really go to the hard places, do hard work, for unloving people?  Yes Lord Send me.  I MUST be obedient to his call.  It is far more dangerous to ignore that Lord than to leave the comforts of this world. Gracia said tonight that many people are asking for a solution to terrorism, or to the moral decay, she said we may not like her answer, but WE are the solution.  God's children are the only hope, because we are Christ to this world.  The Holy Spirit lives in us and we can bring the truth to the lost, to the hateful and change this world.  We know this world will perish, but the Lord and his Word will last forever.  So I choose to go.  As imperfect as I am I say yes Lord. 
I pray that I will continue to be refined by the Holy Spirit and humbled every single day.  That I will expose my sin for what it is and ask God to cleanse me, and give me the fruits of the Spirit.  Thank you Jesus for dying for a sinner like me and for all of us.  Without you I am hopeless but with you I am restored and have joy in any circumstance. 

" No Matter where you live an what your days look like, you have the choice each day to depend on yourself, to live safely, and to try to control your life.  Or you can live as you were created to live-as a temple of the Holy Spirit of God, as a person dependent on Him, desperate for God the Spirit to show up and make a difference.  When you begin living a life characterized by walking with the Spirit, that is when people will being to look not to you but to our Father in heaven and give Him the praise." (Francis Chan, Forgotten God)


Written on Saturday October 9th